Not only is Saddam Hussein alive, he is writing Letters to the Editor, at least according to the London-based Arabic newspaper Al-Quds Al-Arabi, which has published a letter supposedly written by the erstwhile Iraqi dictator. And what is Saddam ranting about? Fluoride in Baghdad's drinking water? Not, he's back on his favorite beef: Hulegu, grandson of Chingis Khan and earlier reincarnation of George "Hulegu" Bush. Saddam: "As Hulagu entered Baghdad, so the criminal Bush entered, with great bitterness. They conquered you, you who reject occupation and shame, you who keep Arabism and Islam in your hearts and minds, only through betrayal."

OK, Saddy, the Hulegu thing happened, like, over 800 years ago: for God's sake, fella, get over it!